1. If we are "literally the only parents in the world" that make their teens leave their phones outside of their bedrooms overnight on weeknights. (Note to kid: have we ever cared about being like the other parents?)
2. Whether or not this room is clean:
3. If the hermit crabs deserve to be fed every day even though the novelty of owning them has worn off (who ever could have predicted that?)
Here are some actual conversations for your reading pleasure:
4. (Time: approximately 3:00 pm)
Us: You have to brush your teeth at least twice a day.
Him (annoyed): Yeah I know.
Us: Okay but you just admitted that you didn't brush your teeth last night or this morning.
Him (totally and absolutely disgusted and annoyed with us): Ugh, yeah, I know.
(End scene)
5. (Time: approximately 3:00 pm)
Him: What's for dinner?*
Me: Leftovers.
Him (groaning): Leftovers are so mid.
Me: Well, they're what's for dinner.
Him (whining): But whhhhy though?
Me: We have leftovers because we didn't finish it the first time.
Him (without even knowing what tonight's leftovers will be): I didn't finish it because I didn't like it.
*This child has been asking me this question almost every day of his life. He has, on occasion, been even known to ask "What's for dinner tomorrow?"
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